Some days back one of my uncles came to visit us. Amidst mouthfuls of dosa, he was recounting how he had visited Tirupathi Balaji temple during Diwali. "It was so crowded but we could see the Lord for 40 whole seconds!" he said with a satisfied expression. "After that it was 'jerigundi' all over again. Sometimes you cannot even appreciate the whole form of Balaji in one visit but this time we were lucky," he said.
After listening to this, I went off into a private discussion in my own head. What is the difference between praying to Balaji at home and going to Tirupathi and praying to the same Lord amidst the jostling crowds? Why do people who are religious say that God is omnipresent, he knows all and sees all and still visit each and every temple in South India to prove they are more religious than anyone around them? If all Gods are one and He is omnipresent, should'nt praying at home be enough to get his favours?
I have been brought up by moderately religious parents. They told me God is great and its because of Him that we exist, etc, etc. We used to visit the temple in our neighbourhood on occasion and perform small pujas at home on all auspicious days. They never forced Him on me for which I am grateful to them. As I grew up, I did not feel the need to go and pray or meditate or visit the temple regularly (as most people do). Most of my friends used to prostrate in front of the Lord before exams; as though that one act could lead them to the top! Somehow, I have'nt felt the need to do that even.
Sometimes, when I feel depressed or lonely, those close to me always say that maybe praying to God or going to this or that temple could make me feel better. I should try and find comfort in the Lord's presence and so on and so forth. I wish that were true. Sometimes, I hope that maybe going to a temple would calm my anxieties but it has never helped. What some people call the power of belief or faith is an unknown entity to me. At times, I try and think why this has happened but I end up feeling lost.
When I look around at people who are fervently religious and chant shlokas for hours on a daily basis, I feel maybe I have lost out on something. But I have also noticed that some of these very same people do not follow what they preach. Just like an overweight person (like me!) would think eating an ice cream or a piece of cake is ok today if I definitely walk or exercise tomorrow, some so called believers commit all the sins that I could never even think of and then pray extra hard the next day. Does God forgive them then? Is it as easy as committing a sin and then asking for confession later as they do in the Christian faith? Does this mean that every religion gives us leeway to make mistakes?
After listening to this, I went off into a private discussion in my own head. What is the difference between praying to Balaji at home and going to Tirupathi and praying to the same Lord amidst the jostling crowds? Why do people who are religious say that God is omnipresent, he knows all and sees all and still visit each and every temple in South India to prove they are more religious than anyone around them? If all Gods are one and He is omnipresent, should'nt praying at home be enough to get his favours?
I have been brought up by moderately religious parents. They told me God is great and its because of Him that we exist, etc, etc. We used to visit the temple in our neighbourhood on occasion and perform small pujas at home on all auspicious days. They never forced Him on me for which I am grateful to them. As I grew up, I did not feel the need to go and pray or meditate or visit the temple regularly (as most people do). Most of my friends used to prostrate in front of the Lord before exams; as though that one act could lead them to the top! Somehow, I have'nt felt the need to do that even.
Sometimes, when I feel depressed or lonely, those close to me always say that maybe praying to God or going to this or that temple could make me feel better. I should try and find comfort in the Lord's presence and so on and so forth. I wish that were true. Sometimes, I hope that maybe going to a temple would calm my anxieties but it has never helped. What some people call the power of belief or faith is an unknown entity to me. At times, I try and think why this has happened but I end up feeling lost.
When I look around at people who are fervently religious and chant shlokas for hours on a daily basis, I feel maybe I have lost out on something. But I have also noticed that some of these very same people do not follow what they preach. Just like an overweight person (like me!) would think eating an ice cream or a piece of cake is ok today if I definitely walk or exercise tomorrow, some so called believers commit all the sins that I could never even think of and then pray extra hard the next day. Does God forgive them then? Is it as easy as committing a sin and then asking for confession later as they do in the Christian faith? Does this mean that every religion gives us leeway to make mistakes?
